Bad Company
by ShadowBluebell
Summary: AU, OneShot: She knew she would never get her Prince Charming, but she never wanted the son of a Yakuza Boss. Too bad. InuyashaKagome


Mama Higurashi and Grandpa Higurashi exchanged a knowing look. Mama Higurashi spoke first. "Honey, there's something I should tell you."

…?

"Before I met your father…well, actually, WHEN I met your father, I was an internationally-renowned jewelry thief."

…!

"And I," Grandpa Higurashi said, "used to be part of an infamous weapons-smuggling organization going under the cover of a traveling circus."

…

Mama Higurashi nodded. "I know this is a bit of a shock to you, but after seeing you with him I thought…honey, are you all right?"

Kagome didn't answer. She slowly but surely turned to Souta, whose mouth hung open while his fork lay forgotten on his plate. She carefully examined him and said, "Are you gonna tell me you're secretly an evil boy genius?"

He met her eyes. "I'm failing science."

**Bad Company**

One-shot

_Sometimes we have to settle for a bad boy._

_Skip back to this morning…_

Today was her fifteenth birthday.

Naturally, Kagome was _not_ having a good day.

The night before a group of vandals had snuck onto shrine grounds because when she woke up garbage lay everywhere. EVERYWHERE. Grandpa insisted he would heroically clean the mess by himself, but as soon as he stepped out of the door with his biohazard suit on (no one questioned how he had acquired that outfit) he slipped on a conveniently placed banana peel and promptly threw out his back. Or so he claimed.

Since mom had a morning's appointment at the doctor's Kagome and Souta had "volunteered" to take out the trash. It had been disgusting, filthy, wretched, smelly, grueling work. And now Kagome smelled like rotten eggs and sweaty socks. Souta smelled like old cheese in a neglected public bathroom.

By the time Kagome had finished kicking trash bags the shrine steps, it was a little shortcut she and Souta had invented, it was nearly four o'clock and she had to get ready for weekend cram school. Despite a long shower AND a bubble bath she stilled smelled like sewage water. She put on so much perfume when Buyo came to rub his head against her shin he froze and became temporarily catatonic, and Souta, who came to hand her her backpack, became lightheaded and fainted.

And Kagome was late. Late, late, late, and she was probably not going to make it to class at all.

Because her foot had just been ran over by a black Jaguar.

"Holy s—" Kagome bit her tongue. "SHNIKEY!" She fell back on her rear end, held her foot, and writhed in agony. She was in so much pain she neither noticed the stares nor the offending car stop and the occupant step out of the vehicle.

The truth of the matter was her foot wasn't in real pain. In fact, she wouldn't have noticed if the wing mirror hadn't clipped her hip. The fact was she was having such a bad day that breaking down in the middle of the street in the middle of Tokyo during the middle of rush hour traffic didn't seem so insane to her.

"Motherfu—FUDGE!" Kagome cringed.

"Shut up."

Kagome looked up with tears in her eyes and saw the man blocking the setting sun. His shadowed face was framed with long, silver hair and two triangular canine ears. His expression was unreadable under his shades and his brand name black business suit pretty much flaunted his status to the general public. Not that his expensive car didn't already do that.

None of it impressed Kagome. Not today.

"Don't tell **me** to shut up!" Kagome got to her feet so quickly her head nearly collided with the man's chin. "YOU ran over MY foot."

If she had been more observant, if she wasn't so emotional, she would've noticed the way pedestrians and drivers alike distanced themselves away from him and his car and how the scars on his fingers seemed to systematically align.

But she didn't.

"Little girls need to stay on the sidewalk until the signal changes color," was his simple answer, complimented with a sneer.

"The light DID change! _You _ran the red light!" Kagome struggled to stay upright as she put a finger to his chest. "YOU owe ME an apology!"

"Look, _bitch_," he growled, two purple scars forming on his cheeks, "I'm willing to let you go if you drop your hand. NOW."

"I am **_not _**a bitch!" She half yelled, half screeched. "My name is Kagome! KA-GO-ME!"

His lips thinned into a line. She was somewhat satisfied with his reaction…until the corners of his lips slowly rose and he was smiling like it was his birthday. THEN she was scared. "I'll definitely remember that name, Miss KA-GO-ME."

She stared, not realizing her left eye was twitching. She was sure if he took off his glasses his eyes would reveal a predatory gleam.

She did the most sensible thing she did all day.

She skedaddled out of there.

She did not notice the golden eyes follow her retreating form.

Too bad.

_Fastforward an hour!_

Kagome was late, as expected. She decided she'd stop punishing herself and rewarded herself with a trip to the local convenience store to catch up on her reading. So many issues to choose from…eww, not that adult Manga. Ooh, the new issue of…

She was mindlessly flipping the pages when the doors slid open and she curiously glanced up at the new customer.

Uh-oh.

Kagome shoved the monthly issue back on the rack and covered her face with her backpack as she tiptoed behind the counters, making sure the man in black had his back to her at all times. When he went over to the counter she dashed out to freedom.

Only to crash into a familiar black car.

"Ahhh…" Kagome held her sides in pain. Who parked their car on the curb?

"This time it's definitely your fault."

Kagome turned around and came face-to-face with the smirking man in black, who held a sandwich in one hand.

"Serves you right, huh?"

"You illegally parked here," she gasped. She tried to continue but she was physically and emotionally exhausted from the day's events. She leaned on the side of his car and rested her forehead on the roof. Well, at least he polished his car. Wow, she could even see her reflection.

What's that in the backseat? A sword? Who carries—and is that a spare gun holster on the passenger seat?

Kagome snapped around and examined the rather amused man staring at her, the colors beginning to drain out of her face. His fingers were scarred and through the store window she could see the customers desperately trying to avert their gazes from what was happening in the parking lot.

Yakuza.

She was talking to a yakuza member.

…

She was dead.

She looked up and stared at the stars. "I love you mom," she whispered. "Souta, for the love of all that is holy, don't feed my ashes to Buyo." She then looked at the dog-eared fellow and, in all seriousness, said, "Please let my death be quick and painless."

"Degrading or honorable?" He smirked.

"I prefer the latter," she said, not sure if he was showcasing his morbid sense of humor or if he was being serious.

To be honest she didn't care anymore.

"Get in the car." He took out his car keys.

Should she make a run for it?

…then again, she was tired.

"Shotgun," she mumbled and sauntered to the other side of the car. The door automatically opened like most Japanese taxis did and she slid into the seat (putting the gun holster on the dashboard first).

As he started the car he took off his shades and motioned for her to put it on the dashboard as well. He had golden eyes. It kind of suited him. When he drove out of the parking lot she rested her forehead on the window and accepted her gruesome fate. Maybe he'd have mercy on her. Nah, he'd already given her that chance, remember? Stupid, stupid, stupid.

What would he do to her? Take her to his headquarters and torture her until he was bored?

Kagome sighed. This was one **_bad_** day.

To her, hours passed. In reality, the car stopped five minutes later in a dark street corner.

"Get out."

Kagome inwardly sobbed. "Yes sir."

She watched him lock his car and pocket his car keys. Once he began walking she silently followed, trailing behind him like a stray puppy. That was when she recognized the street. This was where she had dumped the trash earlier. He wasn't…did he…what?

Now they were walking up the shrine steps.

Kagome was confused, then horror-struck. Was he going after her family? Holy crap, was he going to make her watch their deaths?

"W-wait!" Kagome grabbed his elbow. "Please, stop!"

"Just walk, dammit," he glared with those golden eyes and roughly grabbed and pulled her wrist. "I ain't got all day. Besides, you're expected back home."

Kagome went mute when she saw her brother with a broom at the top steps. Souta curiously watched as his sister was dragged past him by a dog-eared man. He watched the two stop at the front door and the man in black ring the doorbell.

"Coming," Mama Higurashi said as she opened the door. "Can I—" she blinked. "Inuyasha?"

Kagome, who in the past few minutes had been oddly fascinated with her shoes, looked up with saucer-wide eyes. W-w-what?

Her mother turned from the dog-eared boy holding her daughter's wrist to her said daughter with an eerily serene smile on her features. "When did you two meet?"

Kagome's jaw dropped.

"Today," Inuyasha said. "When she ran in front of my car."

"Oh dear."

"Made me late to my meeting," he eyed Kagome with a smirk. "I think she owes me dinner."

Kagome was speechless.

"Of course," her mother nodded. "You can pick her up next Saturday at six."

"Good." With that he dropped her wrist and turned around, patting Souta's shoulder before he left the shrine.

Kagome was quiet for a long time. Until she remembered she still had a voice.

"What. Was. That?"

"What was what now?" Grandpa Higurashi came down from the stairs. "What did I miss?"

Mama Higurashi turned to her father-in-law and cheerfully said, "I think it's about time we told them."

"Tell us what?" Souta said from behind Kagome.

"Why don't we go to the kitchen? We'll tell you everything over dinner." She said with a deceptively happy grin.

_Present time!_

That was how Kagome learned for the first time in her life that her mother and grandpa used to be criminals. CRIMINALS. But haven't they always been shrine-keepers?

"H-how could…you said this shrine was in the family for centuries!" Kagome exclaimed, her dinner untouched.

Her grandpa rubbed his chin. "Yes. We once used this place as a storage space for our bazookas."

Kagome's eyes bulged.

Grandpa, lost in his thoughts, thoughtfully muttered, "I wonder if we still have some of those grenades stored in the stockroom."

Souta, who had picked up his fork, dropped the silverware with a loud clatter again.

"Now, now, don't tell them about the toys until they're older," Mama Higurashi laughed.

**_"Toys?"_** Kagome and Souta incredulously said in unison.

Grandpa shrugged. "Eh, if you say so."

Kagome shook her head. "Wait, what does this have anything to do with dog-man?"

"Oh, how adorable, you already have nicknames for each other!" Her mother clapped in joy. "What does he call you?"

"Uh…" _Bitch?_ "Never mind, that's not important. What does he have anything to do with your…criminal…pasts?" The c-word still felt foreign on her tongue.

"Your father was his father's business partner," she easily answered. "You could say they're family friends."

Family…friends…

Kagome dazedly left the dinner table and went to her room, not quite sure if she had gone insane. She quietly went to bed. When everyone had gone to sleep Kagome suddenly jolted out of bed and dove into her mother's room, shouting;

**"Why did you set me up on a date with him?"**

"Hmm, what?" Her mother sighed somewhere beneath her comforter. "Think of it as your birthday present. Now go to sleep."

Kagome went to bed more disturbed than ever.

"I thought they might be hiding something," Souta said the next morning, sweeping the same spot he had swept when Inuyasha dropped by. "I mean, I thought they might be hiding a sealed demon or a captured spirit. But this is…wow."

"Yeah," Kagome muttered. "Wow."

"Do you think we could find those grenades?"

Kagome didn't answer.

When Monday came she was uncharacteristically quiet.

"What's the matter?" Ayumi skipped by. "Did you fail a test?"

Kagome didn't answer.

"I bet you have the virus again," Eri teased. "Where's your face mask?"

"No, no, I bet," Yuka whispered, "it's boy problems."

Kagome sighed.

"I knew it!"

They pried about her love life all throughout the day but Kagome would not budge. Until, that is, he came by to pick her up.

Ayumi, Erik and Yuka stared at the red Dodge Viper, which at the moment was gathering a huge crowd in front of the school. Then Inuyasha, who had on casual hoodie and jeans, got out and looked at Kagome expectantly.

"Err…I'll see you guys tomorrow," Kagome left her three shocked friends and hesitantly approached her ride.

"Get in."

"Right," Kagome sighed.

The ride, needless to say, was uncomfortable. It got even more uncomfortable when he drove into an unfamiliar street and stopped at a rather shady spot. "This is our stop. Leave your bag."

When he pulled out his wallet Kagome discreetly took a peek at his driver's license. He was twenty-one. He was 6 years older than her.

What the hell had mom been thinking?

Kagome got out and followed Inuyasha, wondering where he was taking her to. She was led through a series of narrow alleyways until they came upon a seedy, European bar. A small bell announced their entrance and a balding man with impossibly large eyes looked up.

"Ah, I see you're back, I—who's this young lady?"

"She's Higurashi's kid. Kagome, Totosai. Totosai, Kagome."

Kagome awkwardly bowed as the old man's eyes became wider and more unnerving. She was more than willing to follow Inuyasha into the backroom as Totosai continued to stare at her. It turned out the bar was a front for a much, much, MUCH larger residence area. They passed an elevator that indicated there were five whopping basements. Five. Yeesh.

"Inuyasha, where were y—" A very pretty girl not much older than Kagome jogged up to them. She had on a traditional yukata and held a tray of…ammunitions? "Oh, who's your guest?"

"Kagome Higurashi. This is Sango, bodyguard slash exterminator extraordinaire," he said as he handed her his keys and wallet. "I guess I'm late for practice."

"As always," Sango grumbled before she addressed Kagome with a polite smile. "It's nice to meet you, Miss Higurashi."

"Call me Kagome," she said and bowed.

"Sure. Would you like to watch Inuyasha's lesson?"

Lesson?

Kagome slowly nodded and found herself in a large indoor shooting range. Kagome thought it had the same aura as the fabled bowling alley in the presidential White House. As she looked around in awe Inuyasha took up a pistol from a silver platter. "Headphones?" Kagome turned around and was handed a grey headphone. As soon as she put them on there was a loud gunshot. Kagome instinctively flinched and stepped back. It was one thing to watch gunfire on the silver screen; it was another to actually listen and watch a man fire an actual firearm.

So imagine her shock when Inuyasha turned around and asked, "You wanna try?"

She was pretty sure she wasn't supposed to. She was pretty sure she had to refuse. And yet she stepped forward and allowed his larger hands to deftly wrap around her fingers, knowledgably guiding her index finger to the trigger. He held his arms over her shoulders and quietly said beside her ear, "This is a stationary target practice. The walls are reinforced so don't worry about ricochets."

She hadn't been worried about ricochets until he mentioned it.

"Fire."

Kagome was so surprised by his nonchalant order she pulled the trigger without thinking. It was a mile off.

He pulled her closer to his chest. She briefly wondered if he was making her blush on purpose. "Try again. See the target? Aim for the head."

Easy for him to say.

Kagome squinted and aimed. She gulped and, biting her bottom lip, fired. Suddenly the target had a hole in its stomach.

Sango clapped. "Not bad."

Kagome, however, was shaking. Inuyasha patted her shoulder and softly pushed her away. "You can wait in my office."

She gladly left the shooting range. Sango led her to another room through a secret door and she took a seat in a large room that looked like her school library. While she waited on the oversized leather chair her eyes landed on a small portrait. She stared in confusion. That looked a lot like her when she was a child.

"Kikyou Mikono."

Kagome looked up as a man around Inuyasha's age walked in. He had on a business suit, minus the jacket. Plus he had the top of his white shirt unbuttoned.

"Inuyasha had a French painter draw a portrait of her picture, right after she died of pneumonia," he shook his head. "Such a shame. My name is Miroku Hoshino, by the way."

"Kagome Higurashi," she stood up and bowed. Kikyou…there was an eerie resemblance between her and Kagome. "How old was she when she died?"

"About six…actually, she died on her sixth birthday, nearly fifteen years ago," he said. He was about to continue when a small bell chimed. "Oh, I'm sorry. It seems my expertise is needed elsewhere. It was a pleasure meeting you, Miss."

Kagome watched him leave before going back to the portrait above the bookshelves. It wasn't a coincidence that she resembled her. No wonder Totosai had stared at her. Then her eyes traveled down to a small leather-bound black book on top of some open books. Kagome curiously picked up the black book. What's this? An address book—oh dear. Phone numbers after phone numbers of girls…so many girls. Kagome's eyes widened after each page she flipped. So…many…

Kagome slammed the book shut when she thought someone stepped into the room. Luckily it was just the blind automatically closing to block the sun.

She sighed. He was worse than a Yakuza member. He was a playboy pining after a dead childhood sweetheart.

What did she get herself into?

It was around seven when she was finally allowed to return home. Since Inuyasha had a meeting "with some reluctant business owners," Sango, who was eighteen years old, drove her to her shrine. Let me tell you, a Japanese teen who had recently received her license…yikes.

"WRONG LANE, WRONG LANE!" Kagome screeched, holding onto the dashboard for dear life. "THAT'S THE WRONG WAY!"

"Oh please," Sango chuckled. "Everyone else is going the wrong way. That's just life, you know?" She swerved around a truck. "GET OFF THE ROAD, GRANDMA!"

Kagome practically kissed the ground when she was dropped off.

"Inuyasha's taking you to a French restaurant, by the. Wear something nice…" she looked at something scrawled on her hand. "…that's what he said, anyway. See you in a couple days!" And then she was gone in all her mad-driving glory.

Kagome whimpered at the thought of being driven by Sango again. She didn't think it was possible but she preferred being driven by Inuyasha, of all people.

She trudged up to her house and was too tired to announce her arrival when she opened the front door. That was why she overheard her mom and grandpa discussing some very interesting plans. "If his father was alive he would've been so happy. But being a Yakuza boss comes with a heavy price." There was a forlorn sigh. Then…

"Small wedding or big wedding?"

Kagome practically collapsed on the floor.

She had never asked for a prince charming. She had never begged to be rescued by a knight-in-shining-armor. But she definitely never asked for the son of a Yakuza boss. What did she do to deserve this? Had she done something awful in her past life?

Past life…Kikyou did look a lot like her child-self. And she died fifteen years ago…

Kagome wryly smiled as she rolled in her bed. Perhaps she was a reincarnation of Inuyasha's childhood sweetheart. Ha! What a thought. Maybe she could play along for the heck of it.

_The day of the date…_

What the hell had she been thinking? _**Play along?**_

Kagome looked at what her mother had picked. "It's so fancy…"

"But it suits you!" Her mother said. "Now that I think about it the outfit looks like your school uniform."

"No, really?" Kagome mumbled.

An hour later she was dressed, primped, and ready to kill…with her beauty. Souta took a picture of one distressed Kagome and decided to use that picture as his new screensaver. Kagome was busy chasing Souta with a mop when the doorbell rang. Kagome and Souta stopped what they were doing and hid in the kitchen when Mama Higurashi opened the door.

"Inuyasha! My, you look so handsome!"

"Thank you Mrs. Higurashi. This is for you." He handed her a bouquet of roses. "Not that you don't smell like roses already." If he hadn't been a dog-demon that would've sounded creepy. As it was, the comment appropriately fit the situation.

She held her cheek in embarrassment. "You've certainly matured! I'll get Kagome. Please come in."

"You should go," Souta whispered as they watched Inuyasha enter the living room and start an animated conversation with Grandpa Higurashi.

"No way!" Kagome hissed.

"They're waiting for you!"

"I'm not going out there!"

"You shouldn't make a Yakuza-man angry."

"Why don't YOU go out there and entertain him?" Kagome demanded.

"Kagome?" Her mother called. "Kagome, where are you?"

Kagome cringed. "Souta, if I die in a drive-by-shooting, you can have my secret collection of Gundam models."

He hugged her around the neck. "I'll miss you sis!"

Their mother found the siblings in that state, hugging like they were mourning at a funeral. "Kagome, what are you doing? This is your first date and you're making him wait!"

Kagome sighed and pulled away from the somber hug. "I love you all." She trudged as if on a death march, leaving her mother confused. Souta, however, answered with a, "Do I have dibs on your Yu-Gi-Oh! cards too?"

_Time skip!_

The drive was silent, awkward, and very, very slow. She actually would have been happy for an uninteresting night. Just a fancy dinner, long, stretched out pauses as she struggled for witty remarks, and quick, desperate glances at her watch. But in the life of Kagome Higurashi, nothing ever went her way. Even unpleasant nights took a turn for the worse.

Inuyasha's phone vibrated on the dashboard. He agitatedly grabbed it and flipped it open. "Kouga, I told you not to call my cell anymore," he barked.

Kagome squirmed. Well, at least the car seat was nice and soft.

He cursed. "Two of them? You sure Ayame tagged the right ones?"

Kagome daydreamed. Has the apple-picking season started yet?

He cussed like a sailor. "Alright, I'll take care of it."

Happy thoughts, Kagome, happy thoughts. How about movies? Saving Private Ryan, Terminator, Godfather, Godfather II, Saw, Saw II…oh god, for some reason she felt worse.

"Sorry," he said with a thin smile. "We'll have to take a detour. Do you mind?"

"No, no," she shrugged as casually as possible. "Not at all. It's totally fine."

"Thanks." He drove them past the fancy districts and traveled farther and farther away from the tall buildings. Half an hour later the car stopped in the harbor, the outlines of warehouses just visible under the full moon. There were three black Cadillac Escalades next to the docks.

Kagome squeaked and turned to see Inuyasha getting out of the car. He was pocketing something behind his jacket. Happy thoughts.

"Wait here for a second, 'kay?"

She eagerly nodded.

He flashed a toothy smile. "That's my girl."

Kagome watched him leave. Why did he put on his shades at night—never mind. She turned on the radio. Ooh, great music—

People were yelling outside.

Listen to the music, Kagome. La-la, la, la, la, soar into the sky, uh-huh, uh-huh.

Gunshots echoed into the night.

FLY LIKE AN ANGEL, LA, LA, LA, LA!

More gunshots. Did a bullet just graze the car window?

WIND BETWEEN MY WINGS!

The car door opened. A wide-eyed Kagome watched Inuyasha pensively enter the car. He didn't acknowledge her presence as he turned off the radio and started the car. As he backed the car away from the harbor he finally spoke. "Next time I'll take care of the unfinished business before picking you up."

Kagome nervously giggled.

Dinner was better than expected. They actually had a decent conversation, the waiter was extremely generous with the non-alcoholic beverages, and naturally the food was delicious. If only Inuyasha hadn't insisted on a private dining room and glanced at the door every minutes, as if someone would burst in with a machine gun, and didn't always keep one hand under the table THEN maybe the night would've been a bit more pleasant and relaxed.

As it was, when Kagome finally found herself in front of the shrine steps she nearly dropped to her knees and kissed the ground—

"I'll walk you to your door." He offered his arm.

—or not.

"Thank you for dinner," was all she could bring herself to say. Really, he had been a gentleman. Extremely polite and charming. Still…

"Yeah." He was distracted, to say the least. Perhaps about the gunshots—HAPPY THOUGHTS.

They stopped in front of the front door. Was she supposed to bow or give him a hug? She shyly peered at him from under her bangs. He was looking off in the distance, his mind still somewhere else. She sighed. Oh well. She got on her tiptoes and sweetly pecked him on the cheek. Kagome stepped away and somewhat satisfyingly watched him bring his hand to his cheek, wearing an adorably puzzled expression.

She smiled and opened the front door. "Bye." She closed the door.

Not wanting a Question and Answer session with her family, she dashed to her room to scream into her pillow. Only Buyo saw her come into the house.

_Later that week…_

What was she thinking?

Kagome saw him approach the front door from her bedroom window. She had taken an oath not to speak with him anymore, especially not after that disastrous date. Why had it been disastrous? Because the morning after the date she turned on the TV and saw the reporter interviewing a witness, who reportedly heard gunshots and found the bodies of two shady business moguls in a broken down warehouse down at the harbor.

She felt so ill she skipped school and locked herself in the bathroom for twelve hours. Not to mention she had to continuously dodge her friends, having told them the man who had picked her up earlier that week was her "cousin." Bad idea. Consequently, all of her friends were begging for his number.

Now she was home alone and she was watching HIM knock on the front door and ring the doorbell. She seriously considered leaving him out in the cold. But it was beginning to rain. Plus he was bleeding. In fact he had left a trail of blood drops on his way up the shrine steps.

She sighted and dejectedly trudged down the stairs to the front door. Good girl Kagome, always being nice when she ought to be just a tiny bit selfish.

"Get in here," she said with a playful smile and pulled him in by the sleeve. "Sit down on the couch. I'll go get the first aid kit."

He was shivering. He sat down with a loud, drawn out sigh. "Car…had to leave it. It's a block away. Had a flat."

"I see." A flat from a bullet, maybe? She came back with the white, metal box. There were two deep puncture wounds on his forearm and a light cut on his chest. Well, she always wanted to be a doctor. "Here, take off your shirt. Let's make sure we prevent your injuries from getting infected."

Kagome did her best concentrating on the wounds and nothing but the wounds. Never mind his well-toned muscles or his spectacular six-pack. Not to mention his—she cleared her throat. "There, all bandaged up. Would you like some tea?"

"Please."

Kagome skipped to the kitchen, trying to mentally wipe away the images of his incredible body parts. Teabags here, boil water there, bring out the butter…no, no, no, put the butter back in the fridge, but grab the refrigerated dumplings and voila! She proudly picked up the tray with a flourish.

The front door slammed open and Kagome nearly dropped the tray.

"Inu-oniichan?" Souta exclaimed. "Don't fear, I am here, I am not queer and I brought beer!"

"Souta!" Mama Higurashi gasped. "Now honestly, what kind of a greeting is that?"

Grandpa Higurashi grumbled, "He goes to a public school. Why are you so shocked?"

Inuyasha's deep laugh floated down the hall and Kagome swooned. She caught herself, inwardly slapped her cheeks multiple times, and then strutted into the living room to present the tray.

"I hear the festival's going to have fireworks this year!" Souta rattled on, ignoring Kagome's entrance.

Inuyasha nodded. "The only reason we didn't have fireworks last year was because of the downpour."

Festival? Kagome rolled her eyes. Many, many festivals were sponsored by Yakuza families, even if the media downplayed their involvement as much as possible. It was just another way for the Yakuza to get the support of the neighborhoods and draw the ire of the police. That was the funny thing about the Yakuza—as much as they avoided publicity they loved cleaning up the streets and making sure people noticed how much they loved to help people.

"Do you have a yukata ready?"

Kagome blinked, realizing she had been addressed. "I have one in my closet."

"I'll look forward to seeing you there." He discreetly winked.

…WHAT?

She really needed to stop drifting off during conversations.

_Festival time!_

Kagome looked down at the blue, goldfish patterned yukata. It was a thin, flimsy outfit, but very cute nonetheless. She tied her hair back in a ponytail. Not bad—presentable indeed.

"I'm going to catch some goldfish!" Souta said and disappeared into a narrow street, cackling devilishly as he warned, "I'll get you my pretties!"

Kagome shook her head and walked off in a different direction, admiring the lights and decorations. Vendors offered okonomiyaki and taiyaki, teriyaki and odango, and plenty of cotton candy and ice cream. "They sure outdid themselves."

"Why thank you."

She knowingly turned to the smiling half-demon. What she hadn't expected to see was the site of him holding a little child's hand.

"This is Rin," he said, as if reading Kagome's mind. "My brother's little girl."

"Your niece?" Kagome blinked. But she's human…

"Sesshomaru-sama saved Rin from mean, hungry wolves!" Rin chipped in. "Rin's Little Red Riding Hood!"

Ah. Makes sense.

"Why don't you run off? Lots of goldfish to catch," he nudged Rin's shoulder.

"Goldfish!" She chortled and ran off in the same fashion Souta had disappeared.

"Speaking of goldfish," he said and examined her summer kimono, involuntarily making Kagome shiver with his heated gaze. "Nice outfit."

Kagome gulped and said, "I ah-appreciate your compliment." She sure felt stupid.

"I'm sure the Lady of the House would approve."

"Who?"

He gave a crooked smile. "Sesshomaru's mother. She would be the Boss."

Oh dear.

Inuyasha offered his arm. Kagome felt obligated to take it. She wrapped her arm around his elbow and marched forth, side-by-side. Well, perhaps it would be a pleasant evening—

His cell rang.

—scratch that.

For some reason Kagome wasn't surprised. "I'll wait over there," Kagome helpfully said.

"Alright," he sighed and flipped his red cell open.

Kagome trotted to one of the vendors, lured by the scent of freshly made dango, and got in line as she pulled out her wallet from her obi. When someone tapped her shoulder she didn't immediately turn around, expecting to see Inuyasha or her brother. When she did turn around blackness met her. When she opened her eyes again, which seemed instantaneous to her, she was in a dark room. She was confused as hell.

"Hello?" She loudly called and heard her echo bounce across the steel walls. The slivers of the moonlight visible through the barred windows revealed empty boxes and dusty trunks. Strange. She had been standing in line to pay for some food and all of a sudden she was here. "Hello?"

"I heard you, girl." A woman's voice answered from behind the titanium door. By the sound of her voice she was seething. "Go read."

Kagome frowned. "Excuse me?"

"There are books in the boxes. Read one, and stay quiet. Otherwise I'll be tempted to drug you again."

Oh, so she'd been…ah crap, she'd been kidnapped. Kagome quietly groaned. This had been coming. Gah, why her? What did she ever do to deserve this? Her stomach growled. She hadn't even had dinner yet! She sat up and rubbed her sore head. They couldn't even get her a futon! Just some newspapers and a…bucket? Gross. Suddenly she felt relieved she didn't need to use the bathroom.

She just sat there for what seemed like hours. Well, brooding was pretty pointless. Bored out of her mind, Kagome crawled over to one of the boxes. As the woman had said, there were many old books that were frayed at the edges, books without spines and books missing their covers.

She randomly selected a copy and crawled over to the window. She squinted and read the title: Feudal Fairytale. Interesting.

She opened the book and realized most of the pages had been torn apart. She basically read the introduction, skipped to chapter two, read chapter five through eight, and then gave up trying to follow the plotline. Something about a modern girl who fell into another world full of demons and evil men; well, at least Kagome wasn't the only one who was getting into trouble. She mindlessly flipped the pages before tossing the mutilated book aside.

The girl in the book made battling demons sound so easy, even enticing! What a joke. In the real world there were people with guns and knives and…guns…

Kagome plopped her head on the windowsill. She never asked for a life of danger and fast cars. She preferred…

She frowned. A safe life? A boring life following the rules for the rest of her existence? If she wanted that she would've dated Hojo, one of her schoolmates, a long time ago. She pouted at the thought. She wasn't happy with neither a life of boredom nor danger. She wanted something _unusual_.

Was it strange she envied the protagonist of a book? She looked at the copy of the Feudal Fairytale.

Well, if a girl could do battle with a demon maybe she could give him a chance…

Wait. Kagome sniffed. Yup, that was definitely the smell of—

A huge explosion rocked the floor and Kagome went flying across the room, landing on her back with a dull thud. Something fell beside her and the walls shook. There seemed to be black smoke floating above her…oh, the room was spinning too.

_"Kagura, where is she?"_

Kagome closed her eyes.

_"Over there, over there!"_

Footsteps.

_"Kagome!"_

Kagome snapped her eyes open. Now she was lying across the backseat of a moving car. "Oh for the love of—" Enough with the sudden time skips already!

"You all right?"

Kagome looked at the driver. "Yeah. What happened, Inuyasha?"

"One of our business partners had a disagreement. They thought kidnapping you would be a good leverage. Luckily we had an informant." He was extremely agitated. She would know; he was doing a 100 on a road with a speed limit of 60.

Kagome licked her dry lips. "So you rescued me."

He stepped on the brake and Kagome lurched forward, hitting her head on the back of Inuyasha's seat.

"We're here," Inuyasha growled. "Go home. Don't try to contact me again."

Kagome sat up and rubbed her forehead. They were indeed in front of the shrine. "W-what?"

"Get out. Go home. We can't see each other again."

Kagome gawked. Unbelievable! After she had finally decided to give him a chance, it was OVER? No. Effing. Way. "No."

Inuyasha glanced at the rear view mirror. "What did you say?" He angrily demanded.

"I am," she clenched her teeth. "NOT getting out of this car."

He scowled and slammed his car door open. He violently opened the door beside Kagome and lunged for her arms. "Don't be a stupid," he pulled her out of the car with all his might, "LITTLE GIRL!"

She wrapped her arms around his neck and crashed her lips against his. Inuyasha stumbled back, shocked and confused, and left himself open long enough for Kagome to grab his neck collar and none too gently pull them both back into the back seat of the car.

When Souta volunteered to take out the garbage, having waited long enough for his sister to come home, he didn't think there would be anyone in the streets. When he came down the steps and heard strange noises he thought perhaps wild animals were rummaging through the trash bags. He froze when he noticed a suspicious car with tinted windows parked under a streetlight. The car was rocking back and forth and…_did the car just scream?_

"Mom!" Souta cried in fear. "There's a **possessed** car parked in front of the shrine!" He dashed up the steps as if an anaconda was after his tail.

It took several minutes for the "possessed" car to stop moving and many more minutes for one bra-less teen to step out of the car with her socks and Geta in her hands. The driver side window rolled down and the teen mumbled, "call me when you find my bra," more words were exchanged before a quick kiss was shared and the car was disappearing down the road.

The teen happily sighed before going home.

_Many, many months later…_

Souta dejectedly watched his sister check her makeup for the umpteenth time. She wore a very loose, revealing red dress that showed plenty of cleavage and legs. She clipped on some heart-shaped earrings, since she didn't have any piercing, and patted her curled hair. She had been going out a lot recently. Not that he was sad, the two barely spent time together since her tenth birthday, but the fact that she was wearing makeup only reminded him how maturity would soon come knocking on his door.

Souta groaned. On cue the doorbell rang.

"He's here!" Kagome squealed and, checking herself in the mirror again, went to get the front door.

Souta peeked from around the corner and watched his sister carefully hug Inuyasha and share one of there many, many gross kisses.

"Now Kagome," Mama Higurashi chided without even looking up from washing the dishes. "Don't ruin your makeup even before you get to the Gala."

Souta snickered as Kagome and Inuyasha blushed. He offered his arm and Kagome lovingly took it, resting her head on his shoulder. Souta silently gagged.

As soon as the door closed behind the lovebirds Souta mock-wretched. "If I ever act like those two I swear I'll shoot my—"

"Oh Souta," Mama Higurashi turned off the faucet. "I have this friend whose daughter is visiting from London. She's your age. Would you like to escort her around—"

Souta turned white as a sheet, knowing full well what his mother's track record was in matchmaking. **_"NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_** He fled to his room, turned off the lights, and cowered under his comforter in terror.

Grandpa Higurashi cleared his throat from the living room. "He'll come around yet."

"I'm sure he will," Mama Higurashi smiled to herself. "I'm sure he will."

* * *

**AN: **Mu wha ha ha ha ha. Again, HUMOR fic. Now review you gorgeous people, you.


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